


Somewhere only we know

by Assbuts_in_221B



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Destiel - Freeform, Destiel Fluff, Fluff, Hurt Sam, Injured Sam, M/M, Vampires, burning out grace!cas, nearly human Cas
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-22
Updated: 2014-08-22
Packaged: 2018-02-14 06:26:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2181372
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Assbuts_in_221B/pseuds/Assbuts_in_221B
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam is hurt on a hunt (original I know) and Cas tries to help him but with his grace burning out he is unable to heal him fully. Then Cas disappears and comes back to the bunker drunk.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Somewhere only we know

**Author's Note:**

> I just wanted to write some destiel fluff to keep me going in the hellatus

Sam kicked the door open and the two brothers ran through. Machetes in hand and syringes of dead mans blood, they checked every doorway of the nest.  
They were coming to the end of a corridor when a fanged monster smashed through a window and tackled Sammy to the ground. It was holding Sam around his neck and Sam tried to wriggle out of its grip. It's head was edging closing to Sam's neck, it opened it mouth to show two rows of sharp fangs. Sam was starting to get faint and he was sputtering out Dean's name for help. The vampire was just about to sink it's teeth into Sam's jugular when with a clean swipe, it's head was rolling around on the floor.  
'Loosing your touch, Sammy.' Said a deep voice swinging a bloody machete.  
'Shut up! They're pretty strong, if you haven't noticed' Sam was still a little out of breath. Dean gave him a hand up and Sam struggled to walk and was limping as they carried on through the house.  
'Dean, I think I cut my...' Sam was inspecting his thigh when Dean turned around to look as well.  
'Crap, Sammy!' Dean spat the words out worryingly. Sam had a huge piece of shattered glass in his leg that had hit an artery, and blood was spurting out. He hadn't noticed because of the adrenaline. 'Fuck this nest, we've gotta get you outta here!'  
Dean already had his arm around his brother supporting him. The weight Dean was holding was getting heavier as Sam was loosing consciousness.  
Dean carefully put his brothers limp body in the back seat of the impala. He grabbed a rag and wrapped it round Sams thigh before sellotaping it to keep pressure while Dean drove to the motel. He prayed to Cas the whole journey.  
He had Sam over his shoulder when he flung him onto a bed. Deans eyes were starting to water. 'Not now Sammy, come on! Wake up.' He had taken off the Sellotape was applying pressure with his hands.  
'Cas, where the fuck are you? I need you.' Dean was starting to panic at Sams blood loss and the lack of Cas in the room.  
'You called.' A rusty voice spoke from behind Dean, he lifted his head up to see his fallen angel. 'I'm sorry I came as fast as I could, it's just with my grace...' Cas looked intently at Deans green eyes, and tilted his head a bit. 'Anyway, what the matter?'  
Dean couldn't help but smile at his concern. 'Its Sammy, he's hurt. And he's loosing blood fast!' Cas picked up in the panic in Deans voice.  
'Okay, don't worry Dean, I've got this.' Cas walked over to Sam and stretched out his index and middle finger and touched his forehead.  
Cas' brow furrowed in confusion, and he removed his fingers and stepped back.  
'Cas, what's the matter?' Dean had his hand on Cas' shoulder.  
'Its quite a big wound, Dean. I can't repair it fully.' Cas' voice sounded sorrowful. 'I can only repair the artery but that's it, his body will heal the rest of it in time. My powers aren't strong enough.' Dean nodded understandably, just then Sam regained consciousness and sat up. He winced at the pain in his leg.  
'Hey Sammy! Thank God your okay!' Dean was holding Sams face and smiling. 'Thank you Ca-' Dean turned around but couldn't see Cas. He had just, left. Dean shook his head and turned back to him.

Dean had been praying for Cas every night, but he never showed. He had called his cell, but it went straight to voicemail. They had driven back to the bunker by now and it had been a week and Dean was starting to worry.  
At 03:48am there was a knock at the door, Dean rolled over to see his alarm clock and moaned. Who was up at this time?  
He climbed out of bed and walked to the door, passing Sams room seeing he was still sleeping peacefully. He drowsily walked up the steps and opened the heavy door.  
A weight toppled on top of Dean and he stumbled back.  
'Cas! What the?' Dean was supporting him underneath his shoulders. 'What happened?'  
Cas was crying and all he could manage to say was 'I'm sorry Dean!' He set his head into Deans shoulder. 'I'm so sorry Dean!'  
Dean was so confused. 'Sorry for what, Cas? Wait, are you drunk?' Dean was shaking his head. 'Oh Jesus, Cassie, what have you done.' Dean was walking him over to the nearest couch. And then set him down.  
'I'm sorry, I really am!' Cas was sniffling.  
'Stop saying that! Sorry for what?' Dean was gripping his knee.  
'I can't even heal a simple wound, Dean' Cas tilted his head back. 'I'm useless to you!' Dean was shaking his head, eyes welling up. 'You've done everything you could for me, and I have never done anything in return except mess things up! And now, if one of you gets hurt I can't even help you! I guess you don't need me...I don't even know why I'm here' Cas' voice trailed off and he was about to stand up when Dean sat him down again.  
'No! Don't you ever say that! You hear me Cas.' Their eyes met. 'You gave up everything for me and I would give up everything for you! So don't say we don't need you and don't say your useless.' Deans voice was cracking. 'Do you understand me Cas?' Cas nodded his head. 'Sammy's fine, you saved his life by healing him all you could. He's resting but he's alive. Okay?'  
Dean sat down next to him on the sofa and they both turned to face each other.  
'Look, being human obviously isn't as good as being an angel, I wouldn't know but I'm taking an educated guess here... But you don't have to take orders from people and you get to feel emotions. There's friendship, love, hate you name it. And no one can judge you on it, as long as you act correctly and respect other peoples emotions.' Cas brow furrowed as he tried to understand what Dean was saying. 'And I know your not human yet, but until we find your grace I'm gonna be here to prepare you for it. And you won't be useless, because you've never been with us incase something goes wrong. Your here because your our friend, my "best friend" for that matter. And we like having your awkwardness around and your general company. And the way you never understand what's going on half the time... Your family now, Cas.' Dean's emerald eyes were staring directly into the angel's sapphire eyes, Dean had a warming smile on his face. Cas tilted his head and smiled back. 'Come here'  
Dean was tightly hugging Cas with his arms rubbing his back, Cas had also managed to awkwardly place his hand around Dean's shoulder blades.  
There was something Cas liked about hugging Dean, other than being the only person he has properly hugged. His breath always smelt like beer 24/7, but Cas had grown to like it and his clothes were a mix of soapy washing powder and sweat. He would have both his hands on your back and he would squeeze, but it wasn't like a suffocating squeeze it was more of a squeeze that made you not want to ever let go, and Cas didn't.  
Unfortunately for Cas, he stank of concentrated beer and whiskey mixed with cigarettes and Dean really couldn't take any more.  
Dean loosened his grip, and held Cas' shoulder looking at him directly in the face.  
Cas had this weird sensation in his stomach like a tingly feeling and he realised his heart was beating at a higher rate than usual, all from looking at Dean. Cas tried to think of what this feeling was called. When he thought of one, and "emotion" as Dean had called it. Love.  
Cas was in love with Dean Winchester, the man he gripped tight and raised from perdition, the man he had rebelled against the angels for, the man he had sacrificed himself in purgatory for, the man that he had beaten senseless and would have killed but with 3 words had snapped him out of his brain wash, the man he gave up an entire army for because he would not harm him. I guess it does make a lot of sense.  
'Man, you stink! I mean you smell like booze and cigarettes!' Dean had shrivelled his nose up in disgust.  
Cas was snapped out of his daze and took a while to process the statement.  
'That pretty much sums up my. evening!'  
Dean pulled Cas up and walked him to the bathroom, gave him a towel and body wash. Before telling in how to work the shower.  
'Thank you Dean.' Cas gave him a sincere look before closing the door and and turning the water on.

The next morning Cas was still in the bunker after sleeping on a couch. He had this banging noise in his head that wouldn't go away. He drowsily walked into the kitchen were Dean was cooking breakfast and Sam was reading a newspaper looking for a case.  
Sam looked up and smiled. 'Morning, Cas. Heard you had a rough night.' Sam giggled and Dean joined in.  
'Yes it appears so.' Cas wasn't finding much of this amusing as he had this searing pain going through his forehead, he lifted his hand and tried to rub away the pain.  
'Drink this. It might help.' Dean was pouring a glass of water from the tap. How was a glass of water going help? Then Cas watched as Dean dropped a tablet in, it bubbled away, then the tablet disappeared in the glass and the water was a yellowy colour. 'There you go.'  
Dean handed Cas the glass, he sniffed and surprisingly it didn't smell that bad, kinda had an orange taste to it. He slowly took sips until he had finished the glass and handed it back to Dean. 'Thank you.' Cas gave him a warming smile. It was weird for Cas to look at Dean without having the word "love" circulation round in his brain and he regretted saying "thank you" so enthusiastically and he definitely didn't want to make it obvious, so he decided to stay quiet for the rest of the day  
That evening Dean pulled Cas aside after dinner and asked him what was up.  
'Hey, are you all right.' Dean asked worryingly.  
'Me, yes I am fine.' Cas said awkwardly, shuffling his feet.  
'Okay you know what? Cut the bullshit coz I'm not buying it.' Dean was staring directly into Cas' eyes. 'I know your not telling me something and I know it's bringing you down, because you've been quieter than normal today.' Dean placed his shoulder on Cas shoulder. 'So, what it is?'  
'Its nothing, I'm fine. Dean.' Cas didn't like lying to Dean but he didn't want to say anything either.  
'Look me directly in the eyes and tell me your fine and nothing's bothering you.' Dean just wanted to help and Cas was flattered, so he told a version of the truth.  
'Okay, I am fine but I am keeping seething from you and it's not that I can't tell you or won't, it's urrr that I don't know how.' Cas stuttered as he answered.  
Dean was confused for a second as he wracked his brain for what Cas could possible be embarrassed for asking.  
'Okay... Let's go get a beer then. Maybe that will give you some idea.' Dean patted his shoulder before turning round and picking up the keys to the the impala. Cas followed wandering if he was going to make up an excuse or simply, somehow, tell a heterosexual man he was in love with him.  
The bar was only a thirty minute drive from the bunker and the whole journey was sat in awkward silence, broken occasionally by Dean tapping his fingers on the steering wheel.  
It was like every other bar, a pool table, gambling machines, probably some strippers and whores and alcohol. Not really a place for a angel of The Lord. They sat down at a round wooden table with lots of scratches in it, it was next to the pool table but no one was playing because it was broken. Cas thought that was why Dean had sat there because if this was important to Cas he should have some privacy and no one listening, and Cas was right.  
Dean left before coming back with two beers I hand, he sat down opposite Cas and reached across to hand him a bottle.  
'So. What is troubling the baby in a trench coat today?' Asked Dean sarcastically. Cas glared at him while taking massive gulps of the bottle. 'Hey, slow down on the beer there. I'm not having a repeat of last night and I don't think you want to either.' Dean shook his head before taking another sip.  
But it was too late Cas had already almost finished the bottle, he felt fine but he was a little out of it. 'Ive been wondering. If I took the trench coat off, would you have any other jokes left.' Cas couldn't help but laugh at his own joke. 'And I'm not even a baby, this vessel is a fully grown male human being.' Cas was still laughing while he was talking. Dean was shaking his head smirking while taking sips.  
'Cas, I'm being serious what's the matter.' Dean picked up a handful I peanuts from the middle of the table.  
'Well... ummm... I don't know how to say this... I don't want to make you uncomfortable!'  
'Cas! What is it you pussy?'  
'Dean, think I'm in love with you.' Cas was looking down at the table before looking up and furrowing his brow.  
'Man, I love you too Cas.' Dean was laughing. 'But I think you've had a little to much too drink.'  
'Dean. I'm being serious, when you looked at me last night I had this feeling in my stomach-'  
'That was probably bile, you were throwing up most of the night.' Dean was taking quicker sips and was starting to fidget with the label on he beer bottle.  
'Dean, please just listen to me. You said last night, I've given up everything for you and you've would do the same. And I know I don't really know what love is but I have a pretty good idea from looking down on people from heaven, and I feel the same way they did when I look at you.' Cas was piercing his eyes into Dean's. Staring so intently at Dean it made him uncomfortable. Dean broke away from the stare and didn't know what to say.  
'Cas, I... Let's just get you home.' Dean was standing up and Cas did the same. It was so awkward and Cas regretted everything he'd just said, he loved Dean and know he wouldn't be able to even look at him without sheer embarrassment.  
'Here some money, there's a motel down the road. Stay there for a while. I think Sams found a case so we won't be in the bunker for a while. Okay? Just stay in the motel.' Dean pulled out some notes and handed them to Cas, without saying anything else he got in the impala and drove off leaving he angel standing outside a bar. Cas half waved as the impala drove past him and into the blackness.

Dean hadn't noticed but he hadn't been eating much since that night with Cas, he really wasn't hungry and everything Cas had said was going on a loop on his head like a broken record player. 'I think I'm in love with you.' That kind of thing.  
'Where's Cas? He's been gone longer than usual.' Sam randomly asked one morning while making eggs for the two of them.  
'Urr I dunno.' Dean was still in his pyjamas, which was sweatpants and a loose fitting t-shirt. He was playing with the elastic chord around the trousers. 'Anyway, how's your leg?' Dean was eager to change the subject. Literally anything right now, Dean would be happy discussing rather than him questioning his sexuality for an angel who has dreamy eyes. Dean didn't realise it but he was dreaming about Cas' blue eyes until Sam answered him and snapped him out of his daze.  
'Dean that happened over a week ago, I'm fine.' Sam turned down the dial on the cooker and carried the pan over to where Dean was sitting, he put two eggs on each plate. 'But seriously, where's Cas? You went out for a beer with him last week and he hasn't called or anything.' Sam was making dramatic hand movements while he spoke. 'I mean unless you murdered him in a dark alley, that's the only plausible reason I have for him being gone.' Sam was smirking trying to get Dean to tell him the truth.  
'I didn't murder him in a back alley, Sammy!' Dean was smirking and shaking his head in amusement. He cleared his throat and he had a straight face when he responded. 'I dunno what happened he just said he was having trouble with his grace and needed some alone time.' Dean said this through gritted teeth as the truth was he had left Cas outside a bar in the middle of the night with $250+ and no idea where he was.  
'I think you need to see him!' Sam answered. 'I mean, you're always so happy when your with him and there's something about you when your with him that... Just makes you a nicer person.' Sam was being serious and he was looking at Dean with such a sincere smile. Dean smiled back before Sam started laughing. 'But no homo though...'  
Dean was laughing too. 'So I'm not a nice person at the moment?'  
'Dean, you know what I mean, go and see him.'  
'Meh, I don't know.' Sam sighed, he had finished his eggs and put the plate in the sink. Dean was still playing with the first one, he was kinda flicking it round his plate.  
That night Dean couldn't sleep, he kept thinking about what Sam had said and kept trying to deny it, but he couldn't. He rolled over onto his back and stared at the ceiling.  
He started to think of all the memories he'd had with Cas. The ones where they've risked there life for each other and the times they've looked into each other's eyes so contently. The times they've laughed and when they've sat there and comforted one another crying.  
Dean could fell a tear rolling down his cheek. He sat up and wiped it off.  
He needed to see Cas.  
The hunter rolled out of bed and walked to the door of the bunker picking up the keys of the impala on the way.  
When he arrived at the motel, he ran to reception and asked the lady behind the desk if a man of Cas description is staying at the motel. She looked through her book and told him room 16.  
Dean cautiously opened the door to see Cas sitting on the end on of a neatly made bed staring at a blank wall.  
'Hey.' Dean said in a hushed tone as he walked towards Cas and sat down on the bed next to him.  
'Hello, Dean.' He looked up to see Dean's face, outlined with stubble that Cas found so attractive. 'How did you know I would be here?'  
'I told you to stay here.' Dean smiled and he felt a pang of guilt, even after abandoning him he still did exactly as Dean had said.  
He was standing over Cas and he brushed his hand through his angels hair, it was soft which is good because at least Cas had been showering, but he hadn't washed his clothes and he smelt like sweat but Dean didn't mind.  
He reached his hand for Cas to take. Cas had a mixture of feelings and he could feel his face flushing red. Dean smiled and smoothed Cas cheek with his thumb.  
'Take me somewhere!' Dean said soothingly.  
'Where?' Cas furrowed his eyebrows and Dean hadn't realised it before but he loved it when he did that.  
'Somewhere only we know.' Dean was whispering in Cas ear and he got this faint feeling all over his body and he fluttered his eyelids. There was short silence of Cas thinking, he pursed his lips in concentration. Then Cas looked up at Dean and moved his fingers to his forehead.  
Cas and Dean were in a rundown barn.  
Dean looked around at all the sigils and devils trap spray painted on the wall, it only took him a second to realise that this was where Dean had first laid eyes on Castiel.  
The lights were still broken from where they had burst and Dean was reliving the memory of Cas walking down the middle of the barn, sparks literally flying, the first words he heard him say.  
Dean eyes were wondering all over the walls until they met with Cas' he smile and gripped his hand.  
'You still remember?' Dean couldn't help but smile at him.  
'I have a good memory, Dean.'  
Dean ran his hand through Cas hair again and he closed his eyes and smiled. Cas opened his eyes to Dean's warm hands cupping his face.  
'I love you, Castiel.' Dean gave the most heart warming smile before moving his hands down Cas back to the belt line of his trench coat, he wrapped his fingers round the belt loop and pulled Cas even closer their noses were almost touching. Dean tilted his head and leaned in to the angels face and there lips touched. Both of them shut there eyes and enjoyed the moment. Cas had his hands wrapped around Deans waist. His lips were so soft and he was so tall Cas was basically on his tiptoes. Dean's stubble was scratching against Cas face, and he leaned into the kiss more before pulling away. Dean was so close to him, he could feel his warm breath on his own face. Cas shined his blue eyes at Dean.  
'And I love you, Dean Winchester.'


End file.
